Thursday, May 17, 2012

I am still alive!!

Hey lovlies-

Sorry but school took over my life and the last month has been learning to breath again!! I appreciated being so busy, A- I got a lot done, and B- I was so busy I didn't have to think about anything other then school. No worries about dating or the lack thereof, no worries about being married, or not. It was a nice pleasant thing.

I have to say some of the biggest things I struggle with are still there when all the craziness wore off. I feel great, my life is good and I am blessed. But I still feel, at times almost overwhelmingly, that there is something missing. That thing missing is the thing I have wanted more then anything my entire life. Now it seems I am back at square one trying to learn to be okay with where I am in life. School isn't done fast enough, finding someone who I can love more then myself, and put before myself, and just being satisfied with who I am when I look in the mirror. I realize now something, that no matter who you are there are demons in the closet and they come out and show you that you have to always work at the things that are the hardest.

On a side not, I chopped my hair completely off, like 14 inches or so!! I don't miss it, and no I didn't cry. I think this new look is here to stay for a while! I like it more then any other time I have changed my hair.

I will try to appear more frequently this summer, but come fall there is no promises!!

Hugs and kisses!!